Detour...Part 3

Partway through the simulator, I froze.  There were 6 mirrors to watch, a 17' tractor to account for, a 53' trailer on the back, other cars, traffic signals, a corners of varying degrees of sharpness to account for.  I wasn't sure what I was supposed to be looking for, how much space I was allowed to take up, how to judge when to start turning, or even how hard to turn.  I didn't realize it, but a steering wheel in a CMV has to be turned 2 full revolutions in either direction to get the wheels totally pointing in that direction.  That was explained that morning in the in-cab inspection, but I didn't equate that with the effect it would have when in motion.  See, I learned that info last Wednesday.  Clearly, it now makes sense.  However, by now, my class has already probably driven on the highway and backed into docks.  Not too little, but certainly too late.

Now, as I'm airing out my concerns and frustrations, I would like to take a moment to note something very important: the instructors were, for the most part, highly professional.  They all took their jobs very seriously, and were extremely qualified.  Everything the program advertised that it was, it really was (especially in terms of safety).  They have one of the best safety records in the entire industry, and one of the highest pass rates as well.  They expect 110% out of each student, so that by the time you test, you perform far and above the 85% or whatever the examiner expects out of you.  I truly believe their model works...just not for me.  

Demonstrating something to me twice, will not help me replicate it.  Telling me to practice what I barely understand, will not help me improve it.  Expecting me to know what you haven't said, just plain won't work at all.  For those around me who were highly visual and hands-on, things clicked faster (though some of them still struggled with the fast-paced nature of things).  When you only have 2.5 weeks to go from looking at a CMV, to driving it, turning it, backing it, coupling it, and inspecting it...you just don't have that much time!  In the middle of week 3, the testing occurs.  If you fail, you retest on Friday.  I'm not sure what happens if you fail again.

In the end, I recognized that there was too much information to take in all at once, and the way some instructors gave direction did more to confuse me than it did to help me.  In a real-life situation, whether on the road or not, that could be extremely dangerous.  I wasn't willing to risk the lives of my instructor, truck-mates, or myself, so I decided to speak with the supervisor, and we went from there.

As I close here, I would like to say thank you to all of you who have been supporting me and praying for me this entire time.  I've needed your prayers more than you have known.  I am, again, grateful for your financial support given to me before my trip.  Most of that money went toward travel, and making sure I stayed safe (ie. I would have had to spend a 4-hr layover outside of a bus station at 5 am in 12 degree weather, because that station does not open on Sundays, if I hadn't had the money to take an Uber directly to the hotel, instead.  And, obviously, I ended up flying home well before I would have received my first paycheck, so it helped there, too!).

I am confident that I worked extremely hard to try and succeed in this program, and in the end, it just wasn't a good fit for me.  I'm taking time to rest and regroup before moving forward.  However, I am pretty sure that I will be attending a local driving school in late-April.  Due to the urgent need for truck drivers, the tuition fee for this school should be completely covered by a county career training organization.  I'll share more when I'm ready to :) .

For now, I'll leave you with this thought: Sometimes, the most direct route isn't the safest.  Sometimes, you have to take a detour.

~ Amanda d:p